I have sat and stared at this blank screen so many times in the past couple weeks, trying to figure out what to write and what God was teaching me.
I could feel God preparing me for something but I couldn't figure out what because I couldn't see past the wall that seemed to be right in my path.
But last night he brought it all together, he released me from what had been holding me back, released me from my own condemnation.
He gave me the kind of joy I had been seeking and that fire and passion I had missed so much.
The kind of joy that as I lay on a floor laying flat on my back staring at the ceiling knowing God's presence is thick.
As he didn't convict for how I had been living but gave me the gift of freedom once again, I could sit and worship and smile and know that in that moment that is all that mattered.
He whispered in my ear to let go of the control and free myself from the responsibility.
The responsibility to change my life and fix my actions. He asked me to look to tomorrow not yesterday. There is nothing I can do about the example I have been or what I have done but what I can do to live for me.
To live for him in every minute and if I fall it is not about looking at that moment of falling but to spend the next minute in his presence and taking every moment as it comes to be in the presence of God and to be a witness to his great love.
I could feel God preparing me for something but I couldn't figure out what because I couldn't see past the wall that seemed to be right in my path.
But last night he brought it all together, he released me from what had been holding me back, released me from my own condemnation.
He gave me the kind of joy I had been seeking and that fire and passion I had missed so much.
The kind of joy that as I lay on a floor laying flat on my back staring at the ceiling knowing God's presence is thick.
As he didn't convict for how I had been living but gave me the gift of freedom once again, I could sit and worship and smile and know that in that moment that is all that mattered.
He whispered in my ear to let go of the control and free myself from the responsibility.
The responsibility to change my life and fix my actions. He asked me to look to tomorrow not yesterday. There is nothing I can do about the example I have been or what I have done but what I can do to live for me.
To live for him in every minute and if I fall it is not about looking at that moment of falling but to spend the next minute in his presence and taking every moment as it comes to be in the presence of God and to be a witness to his great love.
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